Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Society makes me sad...

For the first time in months, it’s under 80 degrees inside my house. It rained all day on Tuesday, and because of that, the sun wasn’t able to turn my house into the sauna that it normally becomes. The only negative about the situation is the mosquitoes that will now roam quite freely everywhere. That was something brought up at work yesterday, while we were standing in line at Subway to get some eats. Not necessarily good eats, but eats. “I got fucked up by the mosquitoes yesterday,” my co-worker said. “Yeah, they’re out like a motherfucker,” I replied. Seriously, the little buggers haven’t been around until this week. It’s almost September, is that normal? The winter was brutally cold this year, followed by a summer to rival those of 1999 and 2005 -- two years of lots o’ hurricane action. Speaking of, Danielle is prowling out there. Not gonna do much here, it looks like, but behind her is another system. That’s always the story ‘round here. Two storms for the price of one. The second one always catches you while you’re trying to take a deep breath. If I was to guess, and this would be pure speculation on my part, if a Cat 2 or above hurricane hits this part, and I stay, the water will be pretty dang high. My plan is to take my car over the bridge and leave it on the mainland somewhere. Not close to trees. Figure it would be better than here. Then bike my ass back to the beach. Ride out the storm and get stuck here for days. Chances are, no storm will come. I’ve got a stash of water, canned goods, batteries and candles, yet I’m sure something would be forgotten. It is nice to wake up and not be sweating. One could get used to this. The only time I run the air conditioning is when I have visitors, which has been less often than expected. Oh well. Life is too short to get down about that too much, right?

The crickets outside the house are back, too. Wonder where they went? Do crickets leave? Or just die off? Leaving eggs behind to repopulate the cricket Dom. I wish this freaking free software wouldn’t keep trying to separate cricket and dom. I’ll leave it there, for emphasis.

The carpet in my place is disgusting. It’s one of those things you kind of ignore, well, I do, when moving in to a place. I was so in love with the fact I would be two blocks from the water, the fact the carpet is pretty disgusting didn’t matter. I haven’t made it any better by dropping pizza and Guinness on it. Yet, I don’t seem to have much of a problem with it. My couch is dirty from being a dog’s couch for years. Do people judge me for that? If they do, get out of my life. I’m poor. I didn’t want to be, it just kind of happened. Like the old guard said in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade … “choose wisely.” I didn’t. Chasing women around and leaving yourself behind? Not always the best plan in life. Unless you are Ashton Kutcher. I think that is the first time I’ve ever typed Aston Kutcher, and now I have twice. Hopefully, there will never be a No. 3.

Being poor does have it’s advantages … You don’t have to go to expensive parties, wearing expensive clothes, talking to expensive body parts, eating caviar, driving cars that cost more to fix than the value of the car you used to drive across country every so often. But, it does have at least one disadvantage, the tan teeth, white skin dilemma that Mr. Hicks so wisely cracked one night. You don’t see many of the rich without the white teeth, tan skin. But, they only wear trucker hats to be fashionably late.

The rise in humidity just blew in the window. Not a good sign. The ocean has smelled a bit too. Almost salty, but with something not quite right added in. At first, when the smell enveloped my house, the first thought was that the body odor was the cause. You sit around enough, sweating in 99 degree heat, you leave behind a bit of smell. Yet, when I did all the laundry, changed all the sheets and took a shower, the smell lingered. I went outside, and could smell it as well. That’s when it became obvious that the ocean water had changed somehow. Taken on another form. Something given to us by BP maybe? If you believe the media, the oil is mostly gone. But the media just reads press releases and calls the number on the press releases. Getting quotes about the press releases and then printing the press releases, but with “different words” now so they get a byline. Ha. Bylines. My last one was on January 24th, 2009. I wrote a story the day I got canned -- but Randy, according to the press release, you were part of a work-force reduction due to slumping revenues and declining circulation numbers. To quote Steve Buscemi “fuck all that.” I got fired. I think my choice was due to my taking full use of all the EAP at the office. I was fucked up mentally, and used it to get off the ledge. That and the words and thoughts from just a select few family and one friend that gave a shit about me enough to say something other than “jump.” I was a line item on a spread sheet. One that was costing too much money. Even though I was productive, award-winning and all that. Who gives a rat’s ass about such things? Rat’s ass. Ha. Rat turds in my desk at my new office should have been the revelation to get out. Should have. Instead, five months in almost, I stare at them every so often. I want to be reminded that they don’t give a shit about you. And they don’t. Because that’s awful. I do know that right before I leave, if they are still there, I will take a photo of them and send a complaint to OSHA. Swallow that. Of course, writing about it here just puts me in jeopardy. Not like Greg Kihn.

Some words from JT. Oh, I’ve really let my listening to you wane…

Do I feel guilty...about an imperfect life

It's time for me...to take what's mine

I don't want to...live in the present

I make myself ill, at times I'm happy

But society makes me sad

My past...involves my future

I have to manifest...my destiny

If I lose my self, I lose what's precious, and if there's

not something wrong with me... There should be

But society makes me sad

Your society makes me sad (2 times)

If invisibility...could be achieved

Life, could be so nice, I could

walk around be around and nobody

Nobody'd know I was around

(Repeat 1st verse)

(Repeat chorus)

Your society makes me sad…

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